A season of firsts.

On January 23, it was back to see the surgeon for a follow up, she did an internal and discovered I was closed up now, so things were progressing as planned, for a change I was then officially released into my local Doctors care, which I was thrilled about, no more trips. Still battling alot with poor sleep, burning insides, panic, and depression. By Jan 26, I was beginning to sleep a little better, and started to look forward to bedtime. January 27, I weighed in at 139.5, when on the week previous I had been 142. This sent me into a tailspin as I was convinced that I was not absorbing the nutrients from my food, and was beginning to get sick again. Mark reassured me that I was not, and that I just needed more time. He was right, again…. On January 28th. I began anti-depressants. I haven’t mentioned much about it, but the hot flashes through out this journey were horrendous, very intense. They told me when you are thrown into menopause through surgery, its intensified a great deal. I was put on an estrogen patch when I was released from hospital the last time, to try and curb the effects of immediate menopause, was unable to remain using the patch, as I developed several migraines and was taken off the patch as a result.February 1,2012. Some of the symptoms I began to be aware of, as the more serious issues began to diminish, were cold and hot flashes down my arms and into my hands. My weight was increasing I was up to 145 now. On February 3, I began physio, the lady was very nice, came into our home, was very shocked at how weak I was, seemed very concerned, and said she would be back regularly. Feb 4, I had my very first outing, went to visit my in laws. It went really well. On the 6th, Mark took me out to get my haircut, although it was totally exhausting, it was worth every minute. I also showered alone for the first time this day, but Mark remained very close as I still began to shake very quickly. Our many trips to the grocery store I could only sit in the car and wait, as I was not strong enough to even walk to the doors never mind go shopping, but finally on the 8th of February I was able to go into the store, very briefly, but still able to. February 7, Mark piggy backed me downstairs, first time I had been downstairs since Oct 31,2011. I also made a conscious decision that I was going to live life, no more being a victim, no more waiting for illness to come on me, but charging through, grabbing life, living life. By February 11, I had mastered the stairs by myself.

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